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+--- Thread: OH HECK!! ...Let's offend Everybody (/thread-1328.html)
OH HECK!! ...Let's offend Everybody - 911JB - 05-25-2010
Q. What's the Cuban National Anthem?
A. Row, Row, Row Your Boat.
Q. Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A. A different bar.
Q. What did the Chinese couple name their tan, curly-haired baby?
A. Sum Ting Wong.
Q. What do you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A. A speech impediment.
Q. Why aren't there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek ?
A. Because they're not going to work in the future either.
Q. Why do Driver Ed classes in redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
A. Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.
Q. What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A. The southern zoo has a description of the animal along with a recipe.
Q How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the dirty word?
A. Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell, 'BINGO!'
Q. What's the difference between a northern
fairytale and a southern fairytale???
A. A northern fairytale begins, ...'Once upon a time...'
A southern fairytale begins, ...'Y'all ain't gonna believe this.
Q. Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?
A. Because all the Mexicans who can run, jump or swim are already in the United States
RE: OH HECK!! ...Let's offend Everybody - twisteroo - 05-25-2010
I'm offended by the one about......oh hell, who am I kidding? I'm offended by nothing. They were pretty funny.
(He said politely to the big guy with the AK)
RE: OH HECK!! ...Let's offend Everybody - Twitchin Kitten - 05-25-2010
What? No Arab jokes?
RE: OH HECK!! ...Let's offend Everybody - 911JB - 05-25-2010
(05-25-2010, 06:46 PM)Twitchin Kitten Wrote: What? No Arab jokes?
Hell No!!! Does that offend you?
RE: OH HECK!! ...Let's offend Everybody - 911JB - 05-25-2010
I guess not. Fine , hows this.
What do you call an Arab virgin?
Never Bin Laid On.
Not yet????
Well, what about this?
When is the only time you can spit in a Arab woman's face?
When her moustache is on fire.
Not YET???
An old Arab lived close to New York City for more than 40
years. He would have loved to plant potatoes in his garden, but
he is alone, old and weak. His son is in college in Paris, so the
old man sends him an e-mail. He explains the problem:
"Beloved son, I am very sad, because I can't plant potatoes in
my garden. I am sure, if only you were here, you would help and
dig up the garden for me.
I love you,
Your Father"
The following day, the old man receives a response e-mail from
his son:
"Beloved Father,
Please don't touch the garden. It's there that I have hidden 'the
THING'.
I love you, too,
Ahmed"
At 4pm the US Army, The Marines, the FBI, the CIA and the
Rangers visit the house of the old man, take the whole garden
apart, search every inch, but can't find anything. Disappointed
they leave the house.
A day later, the old man receives another e-mail from his son.
"Beloved Father,
I hope the garden is dug up by now and you can plant your
potatoes.
That's all I could do for you from here.
I love you,
Ahmed."
RE: OH HECK!! ...Let's offend Everybody - twisteroo - 05-26-2010
Let's pick on the Amish too. I mean with no electricity or anything it's not like they are surfing the internets anyhow.
Two Amish women were out picking potatoes in the field when one of them picked up two huge potatoes and said "These potatoes remind me of Yoder's balls" "Are they that big?" asked the other."No they're this dirty."